Cody and her little brother Billy are on the run, hunted by the most powerful man in the world: their father-President Wilhelm Hickory Richter. A bloated septuagenarian from Jacksonville with erectile dysfunction and a young, contemptuous, cat-collecting wife, President Richter is facing financial ruin and possible prison time.

Cody, a pistol-savvy motorcyclist, and Billy, a tech wizard at 13, are about to finger Richter for the murder of his first wife, Lulubelle. Meanwhile, drug-addled, bickering thieves have decapitated Richter's lawyer and split with his $100 billion fortune.

What to do? Sniff some coke, pop a few burgers, and deploy Lenny and Tiny, mismatched thugs supplied by a corrupt Russian ambassador, to "take care of" the kids. Then engage The Actuary, a hipster hitman from Brooklyn, to track down the cash and whack the thieves.

The result is a droll chase-and-combat through the Okefenokee Swamp, Miami, Washington, Paris, and Arles, leading to an explosive night at Ponte Vedra on the Fourth of July.